Don’t Act Stupid Around The Hormonal Girl…

I finally finished my last pill of Androcur a few days ago and I must say, I can totally see the difference is the amount of stray hairs that grow on my chin. I know, it’s gross, but if you could read my Dr. Rory post, then you’ll be okay.

I remember going to the library while in college and checking out a book on “women of the circus,” for a paper I wanted to do for a Women’s Studies class. Deep in the reading, I found out that the “bearded lady” actually had PCOS. Here's a picture of her if you have NO idea what a "bearded lady" looks like, because you're not old like me. I took the picture from the BLOA website. That's the "Bearded Ladies of America." Just kidding. I just made that up.

This could be me!!! D-: ->

After reading about the beaded lady, was shocked at what hormones could do to a woman! I felt pretty lucky back then for not having but one or two little stray suckers. Of course, it’s evolved from 1 to 2, to more like 8 to 10 since then. I guess I could still own the “bearded lady” title by the time I’m in my 70s but lets hope it doesn’t come to that! Anyways, my chin is feeling and looking a lot better. Thank you Androcur! Even though you screwed me up emotionally and made me into a basket case, you still rock!

I’m so ready to get on with the show though. Taking all these pills to “regulate” my hormones has actually screwed me up completely. I know in the end, I’ll be better, but for now, I either want to kill everyone or cry my eyes out! Every little thing gets to me. I need a fence around me with a sign that says, “Don’t be stupid around the hormonal girl, or she will bite.” I can handle the horrible tender boobs and the nausea, but the headaches and the bitchiness need to stop. Plus, I’m always so tired. This is no fun. I need to be energetic and motivated for my job search, but instead I’m exhausted and sluggish. To top it off, I'm so intolerant of things. Poor EJ. I'm sure he's wondering how we're suppose to have a baby if I yell at him if he even looks at me funny.

Me yelling at EJ because he didn't feed the dogs. ->

He tries to hug me, I complain about my boobs hurting. He tries to get romantic, I ask him, "what did you do?" He doesn't do something the way I want (aka the right way) and I get SO upset. He can be a complete ass too, don't get me wrong, but lately, I haven't let him get away with too much and have called him on everything, so there is no harmony in this house.

I keep telling myself it will only be until December, so lets hope it goes by quickly. I’m keeping everything crossed... except maybe, my legs? *giggle* Okay, bad joke.

I also weighed myself this morning, because I’m a masochists and needed that extra kick to bring me even more down. Here are the stats.

October 7, 2010

Highest Weight: 199 lbs

First weigh-in's weight: 193.8 lbs

Current Weight: 187.6 lbs

Lowest Weight: 135 lbs

Weight lost this past week: 2 pounds

I guess it’s a start. I feel so incredibly bloated though and the vision of chugging down water is SO unappealing to me. Ugh! I feel SO bobby.

Me ->

I’m suppose to go walking today, since yesterday was my day off, so I will be heading out to Coronado Island later tonight, if it doesn’t rain. If it does, I’m going to have to make up some kind of exercise thing up in my living room. Maybe find one of my old yoga DVDs or lock myself in my bedroom and pretend I’m the trainer in some show and make stuff up as I go. lol I’m so kre8tiv. I know.

Here's to hoping my hormones even out more and harmony returning into my home.

Lions and tigers and OPKs?

So today, I finally got my packages in the mail. I was like a little girl at christmas time. My boxes of ovulation kits came in today. It's almost absurd how excited I was, especially because I've been using opks for the last 450 years. I decided to order them online and go for the Clearblue Easy ones. I figure, I might as well get them, since we're getting all hard core about TTC. I've never used the digital ones, so I'm a little excited. Here's a short conversation between my boyfriend and I after I opened the box.

Me: These are so cool! They show a happy face if you're ovulating!

EJ: If you're not, do they give you a sad face?

Me: No, but I'll have a sad face! *giggle*

I would jump off the Coronado bridge if I had to see a sad face every day! LOL Okay, maybe not jump off the bridge, but at least I'd have a good cry! Good job Clearblue Easy! For thinking this through! I would rather see a blank circle than a sad face!

I also should be receiving the test strips for the Ovulation monitor that has been sitting in my closet for the last year. I should probably buy some batteries for it as well. My sleeping schedule is so crazy that this may jut be a complete waste! Lately, I've been getting up once or twice times a night to go to the rest room and to check in on Leila. If only I could sleep through the night! What a wonderful thing that would be.

Another thing I'll be getting into again is charting my morning temperature, to get in the practice of taking it at the same time. I hope I can work on it and also get my sleeping schedule fixed or else it will be useless.

Tomorrow will be a good exercise day, because I will do lots of walking up in Julian for "Apple Days." Just have to watch what I eat! So much yummy stuff. I'm getting use to walking every other day though, so I'm proud of myself.

Exercise -check
Weight loss- working on it!
OPKs- check
Fixing hormones- working on it!
Temp charting- in the future, so check!

I'm happy that I'm getting things together. I'm trying to stay positive! The only thing that brings me a little down is that the opks and the monitor might not even work on me. I've read so many girls who get opks and these expensive monitors and NOTHING. Something about PCOS interferes with things. Our bodies just suck. We have too much of some hormones and sometimes, not enough of the important ones. -sigh- I figure I'd give it a go. We have nothing to lose and everything to gain, right?

So, in a nutshell, I'm going to be peeing on everything, so you might now want to leave your keys next to me... :p